


Kisses and Cigarettes

by SleepingAshes



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Angst, Coming Out, Gen, Growing Up, Teen Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-01
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2019-01-07 20:12:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12239838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SleepingAshes/pseuds/SleepingAshes
Summary: What starts out as an innocent conversation about first kisses ends far more serious than Stan anticipated.





	Kisses and Cigarettes

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this three times and it was extremely different every time. I'm still pleased with this version though!

Stan had no idea how the topic of first kisses got brought up. He’d zoned out for quite a while and when he snapped out of it, Bill and Eddie were arguing over what counted as a first kiss and what didn’t. Eddie swore he’d kissed someone already but he was a poor liar and couldn’t come up with a convincing story to back up his claims. Stan didn’t get what the big deal was. They were sixteen, tons of kids their age hadn’t had their first kiss yet.

“If you know so much about it, Bill, then who was your first kiss? Hmm?” Eddie asked, hands on his hips.

He looked at Bill like he could tell he was lying, but Bill confidently replied.

“Bev.”

“ _ What _ ? You kissed Bev!?” Eddie screeched in disbelief.

“Wait, you really kissed Bev?” Ben asked, quieter.

“Yes, I r-really kissed Bev.” Bill looked a little smug, if only because Eddie’s reaction was so funny to him. “It was b-before she l-left. But it counts.”

Stan rolled his eyes. He was half tempted to just zone out again but he noticed the lack of sexual comments coming from Richie. This should have been the prime situation to pull out all the nasty things he could think up but Richie was completely quiet. Stan looked over to him and saw Richie leaned back, cigarette in hand. He looked completely bored with the conversation but he listened anyways and smirked a bit when Eddie tried again to insist he’d been kissed too.

“Is it really all that important?” Mike asked.

“ _ YES _ .” Eddie insisted. “I’m  _ not _ going to be the only one here who hasn’t kissed anyone!”

“W-well we don’t know if y-you’re the only one.” Bill tried.

“I haven’t kissed anyone.” Stan finally said. “There. Now you aren’t alone.”

Eddie looked kind of surprised at the sudden confession. Now that Stan was actually paying attention, they all looked surprised. Well, everyone except Richie who still seemed like he’d rather be anywhere but there.

“What?” Stan asked.

“I mean, I think we all assumed--” Eddie began.

“Why?”

“You have like! Female friends!”

“So?”

“So you’re really saying you haven’t put any of the moves on Stacy from science class, is what Eds wants to know.” Richie said, “Right darling?”

“Ew, don’t call me darling.”

“I just did.” Richie took a drag from his cigarette and looked back to Stan. “So what, is Stacy not your type? Or are you more into that girl Amy? She’s obviously into you.”

“I’m not really into either of them. They’re nice but I don’t think about them like that.”

Richie gave him an amused smile.

“Ooohh, I see.”

“Are you done now?  I think I liked it better when you weren’t talking.” Stan snapped, slightly irritated now that Richie had begun being his normal self again.

“Wh-what about you Richie? Have you k-kissed anyone yet?” Bill asked.

Richie laughed and took out his pack of cigarettes from his jacket pocket. He lit another one even though he just did finish his last one.

“I think you know the answer, Bill,” Richie said.

“I don’t.” Bill admitted.

“Ask your mom then--”

“Richie!”

The rest of the day continued on as normal until it was getting dark and the boys began separating to go home. Stan didn’t think any of the conversations that took place today were really productive but it didn’t bother him as much now that they were done. It made sense for his friends to be hung up on first kisses, he just...wasn’t.

He was about to get on his bike when Richie came up behind him and draped an arm around his shoulder. Richie held a cigarette out in offering before Stan shook his head and scrunched up his face in disgust. Shrugging, Richie lit it and began smoking it himself.

“Do you need something?” Stan asked, giving him a curious look.

“Yeah, I gotta talk to you. It’s super serious so get your listening ears on,” Richie’s tone was light but the way he avoided eye contact made Stan believe him when he said it was serious.

Only when the others were out of view did Richie put some distance between them. Stan was secretly thankful-- the cigarette smell was frankly disgusting and he didn’t know how much more he could put up with.

“That’s your fifth one today.” Stan noticed.

“Is it? Huh.” Richie acted completely clueless but Stan knew he counted how many he had left often. It wasn’t easy for him to get cigarettes. “So…”

“So?”

“...You really never kissed anyone.”

“Are you-- that’s really what you’re holding me up for?”

“It’s stupid and I fucking know that, but I’m seriously asking.”

“I was honest earlier.” Stan admitted. “I don’t care about first kisses or any of that, it’s all stupid to me.”

“Is it because they were talking about girls or because you just don’t like that stuff in general.” Richie blurted out.

Stan carefully looked him over. What exactly was Richie getting at? To be honest, it was that he didn’t place that much in PDA in general. It had nothing to do with gender in this specific case. But if Richie was bringing up gender… Stan mulled over a few things he could possibly say in his head. Richie was quickly coming to the end of another cigarette as he waited.

“I don’t know. I never thought about it like that. I just didn’t see the big deal.”

“Oh. Of course.”

Richie let out a bitter laugh and tossed the cigarette aside. He went to get another but Stan grabbed his hand before he could.

“That’s enough. Five is enough.”

“Dude you’re not my mom--”

“I’m not. If I was I wouldn’t care how much you smoked.” Stan said, a slight bite to his tone. “You’re stressed. What’s really the reason you’re bringing this up?”

“There’s no reason. I just wanted to know if our dear friend Stanley Uris was still the pure boy I’ve always known him as. I can’t ask a little bit how my friend’s relationship life is going? I don’t know if you’ve noticed but Bill’s growing up so fast-- he really kissed Bev! Did you see Ben’s face, he was so jealous--”

“Beep beep, Richie.” Stan cut him off.

Richie sighed and ran a hand through his hair roughly. He shifted uneasily where he stood. Stan could tell he was thinking of bailing on this conversation altogether but strangely enough, Stan didn’t want that. This was obviously bothering Richie, whatever it was. He wanted to help. As much as Richie pissed him off, he was his friend.

“You weren’t interested in Bev.” Stan stated. “When they were talking about her earlier, you didn’t look like you cared. So you weren’t attracted to her. Then you asked me if it mattered for me that you guys were talking about girls.”

It fell into place slowly, but Stan was catching on. He could tell he was onto something because Richie was getting fidgety. He looked ready to run, honestly.

“Richie are you asking me because you think I like guys?”

“What? No. That’s-- no!” Richie was stumbling over his words in his defense and this time when he reached for a cigarette, Stan didn’t stop him. “I’m not… I’m not asking that.”

“Why would it matter to you if I did or not? It’s not like you’d want to know because you were interested in--- oh.  _ Oh _ . Richie...”

“Stan I swear to god.”

“You wanted to know if I liked men because you didn’t want to feel alone.” Stan concluded. “Richie…”

“Don’t.” Richie spat, hands shaking. “Just don’t.”

There was a silence that overcame them. It wasn’t comfortable, it was tense and every moment that passed felt more and more horrible. Stan had no idea what to say to his friend. He just felt bad that he’d figured it out.

“You came to me for a reason right?” Stan started, careful with how he chose his words.

“I don’t know, I really don’t fucking know why I came to you.”

“You thought I meant something else. That’s ok.”

“It’s not. It’s really not.” Richie shook his head and backed away from Stan. “I need to go. It’s getting dark, you need to go home, I shouldn’t hold you up anymore.”

“Richie.” Stan tried to reach out to his friend but his hand was smacked away. “You can talk to me about this. You know that.”

“Fuck off, Stan.”

Stan sighed but made no move to stop Richie as he began walking away. He wasn’t going to get through to him right now no matter how hard he tried. Of course he didn’t want to leave Richie like this but maybe he just needed time to cool down and think about what to do next. Stan mounted his bike and rode up to his friend.

“When you’re ready to talk, I’ll listen.”


End file.
